The Bend in the Road

If you live in the UK you will have noticed the Back to School signs are going up.  If you don’t live in the UK, here the children have a six week long holiday and school restarts in the first week of  September. In August, during a summer of fun all the shops put big signs up reminding everyone that it is time to go back to school.

For me, since before I had children but had long since left school I have always felt that September is a time to regroup, to see where I am with my goals for the year and work out what I could do with the final part of the year to be where I want to be by the new year.

Often, lets be honest, we’re not where we want to be. Sometimes, nowhere near. In the past I would give myself a hard time about this and believe it was my fault for being rubbish at managing my life.

Fortunately, some time ago I realised this isn’t a helpful method to move forward and now I step back and ask WHY?

The problem lies when we predict a straight line for ourselves and don’t take into account the bend in the road. The blind spots, the things we didn’t see coming.

This year for me I am not on track where I want to be in my life, WHY?

Because I have listened to myself and allowed myself to be directed to the things (books, art, music, creative processes) that provide the answers to the questions I didn’t even know I was asking, till I started to listen, and I found that I’m exactly where I need to be right now.

By doing this, I have had SUCH a revelation. By poking into my subconscious, which isn’t an easy task as a great deal of murk can live down there, I have understood one of my patterns that has been keeping aspects of me stuck for a long time (a very long time). It has made everything I do at times feel like pushing a boulder uphill.

So I have achieved a great deal in my life but I haven’t made it easy for myself.

Can you relate to this at all?

Once we bring these unhelpful patterns out from our subconscious and into the light, then we can reshape them into something, which allows us to gently roll the boulder alongside us and eventually let it go altogether.

This for me is like going back to school where I am the student and the teacher; I write and make art and meditate and visualise and I teach myself how to make sense of things. This is how I’m constantly finding out new things about myself, not just because I’m getting to know and understand myself better but because I now understand the ways that we are always changing. What I thought about and enjoyed twenty years ago is not what I’m going to want to do now. We are not set in stone, but sometimes society would like us to be.

It is like asking a child what they want to be when they grow up. So they pluck something from the air. My seven year old daughter wants to be a vet, maybe she will. My five year old son wants to be an engineer, I’m not sure he really knows what one is. I’m not comfortable with the idea that we decide what we want to do with our life before we are old enough to understand what those things are. Then we go to school, learn a load of facts, much of which isn’t relevant to the thing we chose. Then, supposedly, we grow up and do that job until we retire and then we can finally enjoy ourselves. Which is ridiculous when you think about it and we don't have to follow this pattern.

So, if you are questioning where you are in your life at the moment. If you are wondering why you aren’t in line with your goals. Why you haven’t bought the items or done the things you said you would this year. I invite you to think about previous years.

Is this a pattern or a one off?

How will next year be different?

Do you blame yourself?

In the light of my recent revelations and in the spirit of ‘back to school’ I have decided to open up some very limited spaces for one to one coaching with me, starting in September. You will get:

  • A clearer understanding of who you are.
  • Knowledge of how you were ‘conditioned’ and how that affects your decisions and choices now.
  • Realisations about why you behave in certain subconscious ways and why this is never your fault.
  • A list of affirmations and a series of beautiful art which you can put on the wall to keep you on track and remind yourself of the aligned life you are now living and taking forward with you.
  • A deeper sense of joy and appreciation of your surroundings.
  • New perspectives on areas of your life you had become familiar with, even if they are not serving you.
  • A new lease of creativity in your life, no matter how creative or not you have previously thought you are.

If you are interested in finding out more  please see my coaching page here.

If you'd like to have a chat about it then please book a call here.

Sophie X